Daddy Billy

Painting HiSTORY

Staring at the painting of the two Japanese women hanging in my mother’s house, I realize that I have stared at that picture my whole life. I first remember it on a wall in my grandparents’ house beside the upright piano that my grandfather loved to play, especially after a scotch on the rocks had loosened his fingers. Surrounded by southwestern art, a shadow box of arrow heads, and a painting of a running mule deer, I didn’t understand how out of place the painting of the two Japanese women was. I just knew that it was always there and had come to represent the dependable, unchanging, stability that tends to only be found at your grandparents’ house.

As a child, I always knew that my grandfather had fought in World War II, but his service had been somewhat marginalized in my young mind by what I saw in old movies and what little he told me about his experience. To me, WWII was a bunch of white guys wearing green or khaki uniforms with shirts tucked in and hair perfectly combed with a part down the side.  I also presumed that most of it was fought in black and white. Like my hundreds of plastic army men, no-one actually got hurt and everyone got to go home for dinner. It wasn’t until I had left my teenage years behind that I actually learned the truth about World War II and the truth about the painting.

If you study the painting in my mothers house, you may think it is good. You may even think it is really good despite the simplicity of the subjects. How much would you pay for a good painting? two hundred dollars, five hundred dollars, a thousand dollars? If you were to compare it to a similar painting, you may decide that it  doesn’t measure up. You may even begin to notice the rudimentary flaws in the design, the unproportioned features of the subjects, and perhaps the fallability of the artist. You may decide that it isn’t worth a lot of money until you hear, as Paul Harvey used to say,”the rest of the story”.

My Grandfather was an engineer in the Army Air Corps during World War II. He built runways and buildings on Okinawa. One of his responsibilities was to oversee Japanese POWs. We have all heard the horror stories of how the American POWs in the South Pacific were treated. I’ve learned that, as a whole, Americans were much kinder and humane to POWs than their Japanese counterparts and my grandfather was no different. Although efficient and strict, he treated the POWs he supervised with kindness and respect. He allowed no ill treatment on his watch. As a matter of fact, because of the humane treatment that the Japanese POWs received under my grandfather, they viewed him with respect. I was told that the Japanese soldiers would put on theatrical productions and invite him and his officers to attend. They would clear the front row to provide them a place to sit. When my grandfather was due to return to the States, he bid farewell to many of the Japanese POWs that he had come to know, and in some cases like. It was then that he was unexpectedly presented with a gift.

You may look at the painting of the two Japanese women hanging on the wall in my mothers house and think it is good. You may even decide you would pay two hundred dollars, five hundred or even a thousand dollars for such a painting. The value of the painting, however, may change in your mind if you knew that in 1945, a Japanese prisoner of war painted two Japanese women on a United States Army issued bed sheet using paints that he made with materials that he found in and around an Okinawan POW camp. He would then present the painting to my grandfather as a token of appreciation for the kindness bestowed upon he and his comrades by their captor. How about now? A million dollars, two million? How much would someone pay for a painting with the history of the one on my mother’s wall ? That is a question that will never be answered because the painting will never be sold.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Value is in the eye of the buyer. Long term relationships are created when value is provided. We routinely pay $4.00 for a cup of Starbucks Coffee, not because it tastes better than the coffee sold in the gas station or at McDonalds, but rather because of the context in which it is delivered. Why do people pay hundreds of dollars more for front row seats at a Broadway show or rock concert? CONTEXT! Creating an extraordinary customer experience is not simply about providing quality goods and services. It is about providing those goods and services within the context of:

1.     FRIENDSHIP- People will buy from friends first.

2.     TRUST- When your goal is to provide value rather than simply closing a sale then you establish trust.

3.     CONVENIENCE- Is it easy to do business with you? your customers will tell you.

4.     EMPATHY-  People want to buy from those who genuinely care about their  challenges and problems. When you care, you become a guide to the solution.

Whether you are in sales, management, education or an entrepreneur, the product, service, or message that we provide, is only as powerful as the person behind the product and the context in which it is delivered.

HOW TO WRITE AND DELIVER A FREAKING AMAZING SPEECH IN 30 MINUTES OR LESS

CHAPTER 8.

POSITIONING

Where you stand during your speech is a non-verbal communication between you and the audience that can make or break you as a speaker. We have all seen a speaker planted behind the lectern holding on for dear life.  Sometimes standing behind the lectern is appropriate, especially if there is a fixed microphone, but I like to move. I have seen powerful speeches given by speakers standing behind a lectern, but if you are going to do that then you must engage with other forms of nonverbal communication. Eye contact, acknowledgement of individuals or small groups, emotion, pauses, etc will enhance your presence and your connection with the audience.  If you have some flexibility as to where you stand, you must avoid certain mistakes such as pacing. Pacing is a natural nervous motion unconsciously employed by many amateur speakers. The best way to counter pacing is by planting and moving with purpose. When you begin your speech, do so from a power position, planted in front of the room. Don’t move unessesarily. The best time to move is when you finish a thought. Walk to another point in the room or on the stage and plant your feet. This is called moving with purpose. When you have no clear intent regarding your movement, the audience becomes distracted and uncomfortable.

TALKING TIP: PRACTICE MOVING WITH PURPOSE IN THE SAME WAY THAT YOU PRACTICE YOUR VERBAL DELIVERY.

DO THIS:

·         WRITE WHEN YOU ARE GOING TO MOVE INTO YOUR SCRIPT. EVEN IF YOU DON’T STICK TO IT, IT’S A BLUEPRINT THAT WILL HELP.

HOW TO WRITE AND DELIVER A FREAKING AMAZING SPEECH IN 30 MINUTES SERIES

CHAPTER 7.

EYE CONTACT

A speech is a conversation between you and the audience. It may last 5 minutes or 50 minutes, so you don’t want to lose them. Many of the same elements of a one on one conversation also apply to giving a speech. Eye contact is crucial. You may have heard to focus on a dot on the back wall if you are nervous…HA! What a load of crap. You fool no one by doing that and inevitably, someone in the audience will turn around to see at what you are looking. “Picture your audience naked”. Ever heard that one? I think it is a great idea to picture your audience naked,  but it won’t help you give a better speech. I have found that the best way to engage an audience is by making one on one eye contact with individuals or small groups within the room.  When you speak to individuals, you are forcing them to focus and respond to what you are saying even if that response is a nod or smile.

I was watching the Country Music Awards show years ago and Garth Brooks was receiving the award for entertainer of the year. Garth steps up to the microphone hat in hand and begins to say a few words. From the balcony a fan yells “I love you Garth”. Garth Brooks looked up to the balcony and said “I love you too”. The whole balcony erupted in cheers. Why? Because when he focused on that section of the room in a meaningful way, he made the entire balcony feel included.  That was an aha moment for me that has been reinforced over the years as a speaker. There are two entities in the room, you and the audience. When you engage individuals or small sections of the room with a meaningful interaction, you are creating a intimate connection with the audience that will pull them on your side. It is much easier to speak in front of friends. 

HOW TO WRITE AND DELIVER A FREAKING AMAZING SPEECH IN 30 MINUTES SERIES

SECTION 2. DELIVERY

 THE OPENING

I mentioned in a previous post the importance of the opening line. How it is delivered is equally important. You make an impression on the audience from the moment you are introduced until your first words. You have thirty seconds to make it a good one. The most dreaded sound to amateur speakers is silence and many miss the opportunity to connect with the audience because they quickly fill it to the detriment of the speech.  Masterful speakers will use silence to create a connection with the audience. No other time in the speech is this connection more important than at the beginning. Nothing feels more awkward than standing before an audience saying nothing, but you are communicating with them none-the-less. You are saying “listen to me, I am in charge, what I have to say is important”. When you hit the stage, plant your feet, make eye contact, (smile) and PAUSE.  When you fill the room with silence, you are creating palatable anticipation of your first words which is why they have to kick butt!

TALKING TIP: PAUSE RIGHT UP UNTIL THE MOMENT IT FEELS UNCOMFORTABLE THEN BEGIN WITH A CLEARLY SPOKEN OPENING LINE.

SPEECH SERIES PART 5

HOW TO WRITE AND DELIVER A FREAKING AMAZING SPEECH IN 30 MINUTES OR LESS


CHAPTER 5.

To Script Or Not To Script

 I have had more than one person tell me that they don’t like to prepare a speech, they’d rather just wing it. When I hear that I immediately think that they are  over-confident , amateurish, and getting ready to crash and burn. More importantly, I believe that they are missing a huge opportunity to connect with their audience. You may get lucky in front of a group of friends from time to time by delivering off the cuff, but 9 times out of 10 you will suck! John Wooden’s line “ the failure to prepare is preparing to fail” is absolute gospel when creating and delivering a freaking amazing speech. I am a huge propent of scripting. This is where some people disagree with me so read what I have to say and decide for yourself. Scripting your comments will allow you to craft exactly what you want to say and how you want to say it. You may say “Patrick, I don’t want to come across as scripted”. Great point! Then don’t read your speech! There is nothing worse than someone who reads a speech from behind a lectern. I was having a conversation with a fellow professional speaker named Warren Greshes. Warren teaches selling skills and we were talking about how to engage clients on the phone. Warren said “Patrick, give me the first line of your phone pitch”. I told him that I didn’t have a first line. “Why not?” he asked. I told him that I didn’t want to sound scripted. He then asked me if I had ever been to a Broadway show in New York city. I told him that I had seen a couple of shows on a recent visit and He said “Patrick, did the actors do a good job?” “Of course Warren, they are the best”, “Did they sound scripted?” “Of course not”. “Patrick, do you think that Broadway actors wing it or do you think that they work from a script?”. I said that they work from a script. “Why don’t they sound scripted?...BECAUSE THEY PRACTICE !” Most amateur speakers script out their speech, but they go no further. When they get up in front of the room, it is obvious that they are reading a speech. When I deliver a speech, you will hear many of the same stories. I have practiced these stories so many times that even the inflections on certain words are the same from speech to speech. After you script your remarks…PRACTICE! The key here is not to just memorize words, but learn your speech. There is a difference. Once you learn your stories, then you will have the confidence that makes a good speaker a great one, and if you veer off script, you can find your way back. Former Auburn football coach Pat Dye used to say “practice doesn’t make perfect, perfect practice makes perfect”. I realize that this is a Vince Lombardi quote but my blood runs orange and blue so as far as I’m concerned it’s a Pat Dye quote. PRACTICE!!!

DO THIS:

·      SCRIPT FIRST

·      LEARN WORDS

·      PRACTICE DELIVERY

TALKING TIP: DON’T BRING UP A SCRIPT OF YOUR SPEECH TO THE STAGE. IF YOU NEED NOTES, USE BULLET POINTS AND KEYWORDS TO REMIND YOU OF WHAT COMES NEXT. BY THE WAY, 90% OF PEOPLE DON’T KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A PODIUM AND A LECTERN. YOU STAND ON A PODIUM AND SPEAK FROM BEHIND A LECTERN.

SPEECH SERIES PART 4

HOW TO WRITE AND DELIVER A FREAKING 

AMAZING SPEECH IN 30 MINUTES OR LESS

CHAPTER 4.

The Call To Action

A call to action is a polite way to tell the audience to get off of their butt and DO SOMETHING! It is also a wonderful way to create relevance and a final connection with those in the room. In my speech, I tell the story about when my father died. It is a sad story with a lot of emotion. I tell the story of how my father told his children how much he loved them every day. People connect with that story because they see their relationship with their own parents in the imagery. At the end of the story, I tell them to not let another day pass without telling their kids how much they love them or avoid missing an opportunity to tell their friends, family and coworkers how much they are appreciated and valued. The whole point of the story is for the audience to take the lesson that I learned through a difficult experience and use it to create a positive experience in their lives. A call to action is important if you want your audience to do something. “Please vote for me next Tuesday”, “Take what I showed you today and write down a plan of action”, “put all of your money into the offering plate”.  Circumstances will dictate how focused your call to action is.

DO THIS:

·      DECIDE WHETHER OR NOT THIS SPEECH REQUIRES AN ACTIONABLE RESPONSE ON THE AUDIENCES PART.

·      WRITE DOWN WHAT YOU WANT THE AUDIENCE TO DO IMMEDIATELY AFTER YOUR SPEECH.

·      WRITE DOWN WHAT YOU WANT THE AUDIENCE TO DO TWO WEEKS AFTERWARDS.