Dont Call Me a Comedian

What’s the difference between a comedian and a humorist? Most humorists, especially those who began their careers as comedians, would say that the difference is context…(and money). Comedians primarily perform in comedy clubs while humorists are often writers and speak and perform at conventions, association meetings, and corporate events.

A popular quip among my buddies in the National Speakers Association is “do you have to be funny to be a professional speaker?...only if you want to get paid”. My goal as a humorist is to, not only make people laugh, but to also deliver content, motivation, and expertise to my audiences in a funny way. For that reason, I was pleasantly surprised and a little taken off guard when SiriusXM Radio called and asked me to perform a one hour comedy show from the Blue Collar Theater in Nashville, Tennessee last month. In one phone call I became what I never aspired to be…a comedian. I don’t perform in comedy clubs so, in preparation for my show, I pored over my material and removed anything that resembled content. My wife and I, along with some friends from North Carolina, flew to Nashville for the recording. The Blue Collar Radio theater is tucked away in the Bridgestone Arena in downtown Nashville. The Southeastern Conference Championship basketball game was being held that weekend so we fought our way through Vanderbilt and University of Kentucky fans until a security guard saw us and escorted us inside. The studio audience, made up of invited guests and SiriusXM subscribers, was lined up waiting to go in. After a few brief hellos, I was escorted up the elevator to the “green room” in rock star fashion which is where I decided that I could get used to being a comedian. For about 20 minutes I chatted with the programmers for the SiriusXM comedy stations. One of them said “I love you Blue Collar Radio guys”. I asked why and he told me that he regularly visits comedy clubs across the country looking for talent to put on the radio for the uncensored comedy stations such as Raw Dog or the Foxxhole.  He said “ I will find someone who I think is great and ask them to send me their materials so I can put them on the radio…they rarely follow through.” He then went on to say “when I ask one of you Blue Collar guys to send me your materials, not only do I have a package the next day…there’s a box of cookies with it”.

As a professional speaker I have to sell myself on a regular basis to meeting planners. In order to do that, I must have video, a cd, marketing materials, and a website. When SiriusXM radio asked for my materials, I simply reached onto the shelf and put together a package (with cookies) and over-nighted it. Opportunities come to us every day. The people who take advantage of those opportunities are prepared to embrace them. Talent, skill, and a good product are prerequisites for success. The trigger that creates the emotional buy-in, however, is often in the packaging. Are you waiting to be discovered? or are you building a package that will enable you to embrace success?

Patrick Henry is a funny professional speaker, author and songwriter. He is the author of The Pancake Principle: Seventeen sticky ways to make your customers flip for you. Buy it at Amazon.com 

http://www.amazon.com/The-Pancake-Principle-Seventeen-Customers/dp/1457515792/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1366036431&sr=8-1&keywords=the+pancake+principle

I'LL HAVE THE LOBSTER... WITH A SIDE OF COMMUNICATION

I recently coached a client in presentation skills and as a token of appreciation, he sent me a $150 gift card to Ruth’s Chris steak house.  My wife and I decided to use it to celebrate our eighth wedding anniversary. I have eaten at Ruth’s Chris before and fully intended on tearing through the gift card like Caesar through Gaul, but what happened next was a very expensive lesson in the power of communication. When we arrived at the restaurant, my wife and I requested a booth in the corner so we could be fully present with each other. We ordered wine and perused the menu. I wouldn’t call myself cheap, but I have yet to look at the prices on the menu at Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse and not wince ever-so-slightly. Maybe it was the wine. Maybe it was the mood of the moment, but I decided to throw caution to the wind and order the whole Maine Lobster. I love lobster. Some of my fondest childhood memories are of my father returning from business trips to New England with a crate of live Maine lobsters. I can remember being woken up at eleven o clock one night because my father’s plane had been delayed, but that wasn’t going to stop us from having a lobster feast. My mother started boiling a pot and we dined into the wee hours of the morning.  That’s where my love of lobster began and now I was continuing it at Ruth’s Chris steak house. The waiter described the specials, raved about the filet, and finally I asked “hows the Maine lobster?” His eyes lit up as if I’d asked about his children. He went into a description that had me giddy with excitement. “How much?” I asked. “$37.00?, bring me a Maine Lobster”. It was every bit as good as he described. The succulent morsels dissolved in my mouth, the butter dripped from my chin and my smoking hot wife stared lovingly at me from across the table. I was in heaven. We enjoyed the evening all the way through the after dinner B&B. When the check arrived, I pulled out my gift card to see if we had fufilled the limit…we had. Maybe it was intentional or maybe it was because english was our waiters second language, but apparently, when I asked how much the lobster was, he left off the words… PER POUND. I ended up paying $120.00 for a beady eyed shellfish! I was speechless. I should have become suspicious when the manager came over to shake my hand and thank me for ordering the lobster. I now know why the kitchen staff was lined up at the door dabbing their eyes. They were saying goodbye to an old friend. That damn lobster was probably soaking in a tub for years, growing fat, waiting for a sucker like me to come along. What would you do if you were in that situation? I wanted to wring the waiters neck, but I didn’t. I didn’t even complain. I simply paid the bill, tipped the waiter and left with my wife. I decided that the lack of communication was as much my fault as it was Raul’s. Will I go back to Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse? Probably, although that particular restaurant has seen the last of me.

There are two parts to effective communication. Listening is as important as speaking. My fault was in my assumption and not asking questions. His fault was not presenting all of the facts. Did Raul benefit from the lack of communication?... yes and no. Sure he made about thirty dollars more on his tip, but he lost the opportunity to create a profitable relationship. Every time you interact with a customer, it is an opportunity to seed the relationship for future opportunities. Had Raul been more forth coming with the information, he would have created an emotional debt that I would have paid at a future date. Maybe with friends, clients, or even a party of ten.

Are you creating a culture of openness with your clients, customers or team? Do you communicate effectively? As the presidential campaign is in full swing, Mitt Romney is being blasted for not sharing his financial records, and this is ticking some folks off. I don’t care which side of the aisle you’re on, I believe that those who find this offensive do so, not because they care how much money he makes, but rather because of the lack of communication. When you don’t communicate effectively you diminish trust. No trust? No Sale!

SELLING THE EXPERIENCE

I was coming to the end of a long Honey-do list which had me standing in the liquor store staring at bottles of Skinny Girl Vodka. My wife is a teacher so during the school year we rarely drink alcohol but since it was summer, we’ve resurrected the age old tradition of five o’clock  happy hour. I was trying to remember which flavor I was supposed to pick up when a friendly gentleman named Van Poteet approached me. I don’t know how long Van has worked at the ABC store, but this was the first time I’d met him. I was taken a little off guard by his smile and casual manner especially since I’ve rarely seen an ABC employee anywhere other than behind the counter ringing up sales. Van asked me “whatcha drinking tonight?”. I told him that my wife wanted to make some kind of cocktail that involved Skinny Girl Vodka. “Have you ever tried a King?” Van asked. I had no idea what a King was, but Van got so excited telling me about this new drink that I got caught up in his enthusiasm. A King was basically an ounce of Bannana Liqueur and and ounce and a half of PB&J Vodka. You read correctly…Peanut Butter and Jelly Vodka. Van began to share with me three different variations of the drink and convinced me that I would be missing the most amazing  cocktail in the modern world if I left the ABC store without the ingredients for “the King”.  I walked into the ABC store for a $15.00 bottle of Vodka and walked out with $65.00 worth of cheer. Unlike most the the ABC liquor store employees across the country, Van Poteet does not sell liquor. Van Poteet sells experiences. He sells cocktail hours, wedding toasts, libations, celebrations, and intimate evenings.  As I reflect on my experience with an objective frame of reference, I imagine that Van was told to “push the new PB&J Vodka”. Had he simply asked me to consider the new Vodka, I would have politely declined, but Van knows that people buy for two reasons; the desire for gain or the fear of loss. Van made me feel that if I left without buying what he suggested, I would be missing out on a terrific experience. Van reinforced, for me, a few simple truths about sales.

1.     SELL THE OUTCOME. The PB&J Vodka was simply the means to achieve that outcome.

2.    CONNECT WITH EMOTION. Van made me want to buy because of his enthusiasm. I wanted to be a part of what made him so excited. When you truly believe in your product, your enthusiasm will be your best wingman.

3.    KNOW YOUR PRODUCT. Van was so convinced that I would enjoy what he was selling that he gave step by step directions as to how to best use it. One of the 5 traction points for a killer customer experience is convenience. By making it easy for someone to use your product or do business with you, you create a buying atmosphere.

LAZY LEADERSHIP

It’s finally over. After three years of planning, organizing, creating and agonizing as the convention chair of the 2012 National Speakers Association convention in Indianapolis this summer, I’m officially old news. My synapses are once again beginning to fire steady, my world is coming back into focus, and now I reflect. The convention was a huge success and although I’d love to take credit for the entire event, I can’t…or can I?

For ten years I was a professional musician and songwriter in Nashville, Tennessee. Incidentally, I learned more about leadership, management, HR, sales, and psychology by being the front man of a band than in any class I ever took at the University of Southern Mississippi. The most important lesson that I learned is that the best leaders are lazy. Let me explain. We’ve all read in The Adventures of Tom Sawyer  about how Tom coerced his friends into cheerfully white washing the fence that he was supposed to paint while he relaxed in the shade. Tom would rather be lazy than do the work himself. Did that make him a bad leader? No Way! I planned a successful convention that was attended by over 1000 professional speakers from 14 different countries. It has been receiving rave reviews, and just as I did when I was the front man in a band, I learned two things from my experience as convention chair. 1. I like being in charge, and 2. You can get other people to cheerfully do the work for you… if you know how.

FIVE WAYS TO BECOME A LAZY LEADER:

1 GET THE RIGHT PEOPLE. I am right brained.  I am creative, vision driven, and focused on the big picture. I surround myself with people who live in the details and enjoy logistics. A “LAZY” leader will compliment their weaknesses with the strengths of others.

2. COMMUNICATE VISION. When I fronted a band, I would never tell the other musicians what to play. I selected the song, tempo, and feel, but when it came to their instrument, I let them be the expert.  As the NSA convention chair I took the same approach. I specifically communicated the outcomes that I wanted but then let the speaker or session host reach them in their unique way. This allowed the meeting to have texture and variety.

3. CREATE “SHINE” OPPORTUNITIES. A great band leader will let each band member take a solo and give them the opportunity to be in the spot light and receive applause. Incidentally, the best music happens during the solo. A “Lazy Leader” will create vision but then appoint quality people to carry it out. By observing but not micromanaging their efforts, they will be free to add their flavor and take credit for their contribution. As the NSA convention chair I gave my team an opportunity to be on stage more than I was. This rewarded their efforts with publicity.

4. PRAISE OFTEN.  It never fails to amaze me what a powerful motivator recognition is. No matter how successful, wealthy, or accomplished a person is, we all crave an “atta-boy” from time to time. When you make habits out of delivering honest, consistent recognition and praise, you will create a team of confident, happy, employees who strive for excellence.

5. BE NICE. I believe that people are more productive when working with nice people . I believe civility is good for business. When you are nice to people, you create loyalty. Loyalty fosters commitment. Commitment is the basis for a culture of excellence.

Social Media Is For The Dogs!

I finally get social media.  No, I didn’t just acquire 500 linkedin connections, or get my twitter account up and running. Like 3/4ths of the human population, I have been a user of social media for years. It is only now that I finally get it. Like most facebook users over thirty, I segment my friends into those I went to high school with, college buddies, professional acquaintances, local friends, and cyber hookers with 46 friends who slip through the cracks undetected. I usually post witty remarks, photos, or videos about my life, business, kids, accomplishments, or challenges. I send it out into the universe hoping that my thousands of friends find me as interesting as I do. I am all things to all people.

      Yesterday I had a pure social media experience that gave me my AHA! Moment. My three year old was standing at the door yelling goggy, goggy. I was working in my office placating her with “that’s right dear, doggy, good doggy”. She became more animated so I got up and walked to the glass door. She was nose to nose with a black, wolfish looking dog that had wandered onto our porch. It turned out that the dog was very friendly, very thirsty, and very lost. Its tag had fallen off, so after giving it water and explaining to my daughter why we don’t put our face next to strange dogs, I took a picture with my Iphone and posted on my facebook page. My post simply said “lost dog. If you live in Burlington and recognize this dog, get in touch…before my kids get too attached”.  Within ½ hour, the dog was back home safe and sound with its grateful owners thanks to one of my facebook peeps who live next door to them. I now realize that this is what social media is all about. It is certainly what the 25 year old twitter users with 150,000 followers have understood from the start. Social media is about more than connection, it is about connecting on common ground.  It is about having a conversation with like minded souls on a specific topic. Did my 1500 plus facebook friends who do not live in my town respond to my post? No! because I wasn’t talking to them and they knew it. Most of us are like the guy on the off ramp with the sign that says “will work for food…God bless”. His message is generic and displayed without purpose. Thousands pass him daily with little interest in his message. When we start joining conversations based on topic, geography, ideology, brand loyalty etc., we can then make connections with individuals on a personal level. They will buy our products, align with our beliefs, and drink our kool-aid. By the way, if you happen to pay someone to tweet, post, or manage your social media, you have missed the point. In order to effectively use social media, you must be authentic and be willing to participate in a conversation. If you are the only one who is doing the talking, you are talking to yourself.

HOW TO WRITE AND DELIVER A FREAKING AMAZING SPEECH IN 30 MINUTES SERIES

CHAPTER 7.

EYE CONTACT

A speech is a conversation between you and the audience. It may last 5 minutes or 50 minutes, so you don’t want to lose them. Many of the same elements of a one on one conversation also apply to giving a speech. Eye contact is crucial. You may have heard to focus on a dot on the back wall if you are nervous…HA! What a load of crap. You fool no one by doing that and inevitably, someone in the audience will turn around to see at what you are looking. “Picture your audience naked”. Ever heard that one? I think it is a great idea to picture your audience naked,  but it won’t help you give a better speech. I have found that the best way to engage an audience is by making one on one eye contact with individuals or small groups within the room.  When you speak to individuals, you are forcing them to focus and respond to what you are saying even if that response is a nod or smile.

I was watching the Country Music Awards show years ago and Garth Brooks was receiving the award for entertainer of the year. Garth steps up to the microphone hat in hand and begins to say a few words. From the balcony a fan yells “I love you Garth”. Garth Brooks looked up to the balcony and said “I love you too”. The whole balcony erupted in cheers. Why? Because when he focused on that section of the room in a meaningful way, he made the entire balcony feel included.  That was an aha moment for me that has been reinforced over the years as a speaker. There are two entities in the room, you and the audience. When you engage individuals or small sections of the room with a meaningful interaction, you are creating a intimate connection with the audience that will pull them on your side. It is much easier to speak in front of friends. 

HOW TO WRITE AND DELIVER A FREAKING AMAZING SPEECH IN 30 MINUTES SERIES

SECTION 2. DELIVERY

 THE OPENING

I mentioned in a previous post the importance of the opening line. How it is delivered is equally important. You make an impression on the audience from the moment you are introduced until your first words. You have thirty seconds to make it a good one. The most dreaded sound to amateur speakers is silence and many miss the opportunity to connect with the audience because they quickly fill it to the detriment of the speech.  Masterful speakers will use silence to create a connection with the audience. No other time in the speech is this connection more important than at the beginning. Nothing feels more awkward than standing before an audience saying nothing, but you are communicating with them none-the-less. You are saying “listen to me, I am in charge, what I have to say is important”. When you hit the stage, plant your feet, make eye contact, (smile) and PAUSE.  When you fill the room with silence, you are creating palatable anticipation of your first words which is why they have to kick butt!

TALKING TIP: PAUSE RIGHT UP UNTIL THE MOMENT IT FEELS UNCOMFORTABLE THEN BEGIN WITH A CLEARLY SPOKEN OPENING LINE.

SPEECH SERIES PART 5

HOW TO WRITE AND DELIVER A FREAKING AMAZING SPEECH IN 30 MINUTES OR LESS


CHAPTER 5.

To Script Or Not To Script

 I have had more than one person tell me that they don’t like to prepare a speech, they’d rather just wing it. When I hear that I immediately think that they are  over-confident , amateurish, and getting ready to crash and burn. More importantly, I believe that they are missing a huge opportunity to connect with their audience. You may get lucky in front of a group of friends from time to time by delivering off the cuff, but 9 times out of 10 you will suck! John Wooden’s line “ the failure to prepare is preparing to fail” is absolute gospel when creating and delivering a freaking amazing speech. I am a huge propent of scripting. This is where some people disagree with me so read what I have to say and decide for yourself. Scripting your comments will allow you to craft exactly what you want to say and how you want to say it. You may say “Patrick, I don’t want to come across as scripted”. Great point! Then don’t read your speech! There is nothing worse than someone who reads a speech from behind a lectern. I was having a conversation with a fellow professional speaker named Warren Greshes. Warren teaches selling skills and we were talking about how to engage clients on the phone. Warren said “Patrick, give me the first line of your phone pitch”. I told him that I didn’t have a first line. “Why not?” he asked. I told him that I didn’t want to sound scripted. He then asked me if I had ever been to a Broadway show in New York city. I told him that I had seen a couple of shows on a recent visit and He said “Patrick, did the actors do a good job?” “Of course Warren, they are the best”, “Did they sound scripted?” “Of course not”. “Patrick, do you think that Broadway actors wing it or do you think that they work from a script?”. I said that they work from a script. “Why don’t they sound scripted?...BECAUSE THEY PRACTICE !” Most amateur speakers script out their speech, but they go no further. When they get up in front of the room, it is obvious that they are reading a speech. When I deliver a speech, you will hear many of the same stories. I have practiced these stories so many times that even the inflections on certain words are the same from speech to speech. After you script your remarks…PRACTICE! The key here is not to just memorize words, but learn your speech. There is a difference. Once you learn your stories, then you will have the confidence that makes a good speaker a great one, and if you veer off script, you can find your way back. Former Auburn football coach Pat Dye used to say “practice doesn’t make perfect, perfect practice makes perfect”. I realize that this is a Vince Lombardi quote but my blood runs orange and blue so as far as I’m concerned it’s a Pat Dye quote. PRACTICE!!!

DO THIS:

·      SCRIPT FIRST

·      LEARN WORDS

·      PRACTICE DELIVERY

TALKING TIP: DON’T BRING UP A SCRIPT OF YOUR SPEECH TO THE STAGE. IF YOU NEED NOTES, USE BULLET POINTS AND KEYWORDS TO REMIND YOU OF WHAT COMES NEXT. BY THE WAY, 90% OF PEOPLE DON’T KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A PODIUM AND A LECTERN. YOU STAND ON A PODIUM AND SPEAK FROM BEHIND A LECTERN.

CAN YOU EAT YOUR OWN CRAWFISH?... Leadership with a kick

As a student at the University of Southern Mississippi, I began a love affair that has endured throughout the better part of two decades. No, the affair of which I speak was not with one of the beautiful southern belles that make up 60 percent of the student body, but rather with a dirty, disgusting looking, beady eyed little creature called the crawfish. Until I ventured onto the USM campus in the early nineteen nineties, the only crawfish I had ever seen had been in the creek behind my parents house and the thought of actually putting it in my mouth never crossed my mind. Imagine my surprise and trepidation when I was invited to a fraternity party only to find rows of tables covered in newspaper with piles of red, steaming, crawfish waiting to be devoured. As the Zydeco band played in the background, one of of my buddies showed me how to pinch the head off of the little lobsterlike creature, peel back the first layer of shell on the tail and pull the meat out with my teeth. I was hooked. It was the most wonderful tasting food I had ever eaten. It even made the beer taste better. I later learned that for generations of louisianians and Southern Mississipians, crawfish is social fare in the same way that chili is for Texans, clams are for New Englanders, and fried catfish is for my native Alabamians. I also learned that they take pride in the spiciness of their crawfish. Cayenne pepper is the predominate seasoning for boiled crawfish, and for many daring souls, the hotter the better. When crawfish season was approaching, arguments would begin to float around the halls of the ATO house as my fraternity brothers would boast about who made the spiciest crawfish. When I later observed one of my drunken brethren writhing on the ground in pain, wiping his tongue after sampling a crawfish boiled in his personal blend of spice, I decided that it takes no great skill to dump heaps of cayenne pepper into a pot of boiling water. The real test is can you eat your own crawfish?

Not long ago I gave four speeches for a major utility company in Tennessee. After the event, I was chatting with the meeting planner who told me of a negative experience they had with a previous speaker. I was told that he was really good, highly energetic and well liked by the audience. He talked about not letting the little things get you down and negatively impact your attitude. She said it was well received until the second day when he arrived complaining about his hotel room, the noise next door, and the food, among other things. This is a speaker who talks about not letting the little things impact your attitude and all he was doing was complaining about the little things. My contact said that she and her staff were put off because this person obviously did not practice what he was paid to preach.  This guy didn’t eat his own crawfish.

Are you a good ambassador of your message? Do you preach customer service but don’t promptly return phone calls? do you promote positive attitude but curse out waiters? Do you talk about teamwork but reject input? Do you encourage donating but don’t give back in your community? The most successful leaders tend to be the ones whose behavior becomes the model for excellence.  Simply said…they eat their own crawfish.

THREE INGREDIENTS FOR KILLER CRAWFISH…THAT YOU CAN EAT:

1. A TABLESPOON OF TRUTH: If you can’t take the heat…don’t make it so hot. Too many times we will promise anything to close the sale or pacify the customer. If you can’t deliver on what you promise, then don’t promise so much. You will always be judged on the margin by which you fail to deliver…and rightly so.

2. A DASH OF OVERDELIVERY: Don’t just do what you say you are going to do…OVERDO. The cajuns have a word, LAGNIAPPE, which means “a little bit extra”. The difference between good and great is found in the lagniappe.

3. A HEAPING HELPING OF ATMOSPHERE.  "Laissez les bons temps rouler- let the good times roll” The best way to enjoy crawfish is in a group of people who are drinking beer, dancing, and having a great time. What kind of atmosphere are you creating? People want to buy from, learn from, work with, and do business with those whom they enjoy being around. If you are not reaching your goals, then look at the messenger. 



 Patrick Henry is a professional speaker who shows audiences how to create extraordinary customer, client, and coworker experiences. He is what happens when keynotes, comedy, and concerts...collide ! Please visit his website at www.PatrickHenrySpeaker.com