CREATING PROFITABLE RELATIONSHIPS THROUGH...CONTEXT

In 2004 my world changed.  It was altered, not because of events or circumstances, but because of context. I became a husband in 2004. I became a father in 2004, then again in 2005, and once more in 2008. Finally my wife told me that if I wanted another child I would have to do it with my next wife. Up until 2004 my identity existed on the basis of accomplishment, achievement, or circumstance.  I suddenly found myself with an identity predicated by something different…context.  My friend and fellow professional speaker John Crudele summed up the true meaning of context for me.  He told me that the moon is only the moon because of the Earth. Its relationship to the earth is what frames its identity. He said without context and mutual attraction, it is just a rock floating in space. 

I am a husband and father, not because of me or what I've done, but rather because of my relationship to my wife and kids. Just like our identity as a family member is determined by the relationship to the rest of the family, so is the identity of our customers. Our customers are not our customers because we exist. We are who we are because our customers exist. As a professional speaker and writer, I only maintain that identity if I have an audience. If not, I am just another opininated big mouth looking at an empty calendar on the wall of my office. I am a humorist. I believe that funny is funner so I try to incorporate humor into everything I do. I was once asked during an interview “what is the difference between a comedian and a humorist?” I thought for a minute about all of the humorists that I know and gave the most honest answer I could even though many comedians would disagree.  I said that most comedians believe the audience is there for them. As a humorist, I am there for my audience. When you treat your customers as if your existence depends on them, you will be nicer, more efficient, more transparent, and just plain better than if you operate as if your customers need you. When your customer relationship is based on mutual attraction and context, you decommoditize your position in your industry and become the brand.

CREATING PROFITABLE RELATIONSHIPS THROUGH ACCOUNTABILITY

I was recently at an event in Charlotte where I had the chance to meet a man who had made his career working in the cutthroat world of  New York newspaper and magazine publishing. We were talking about the slow bleeding death of hard copy magazines and I told him that before she gave it up, they would have to pry US Weekly Magazine out of my wife’s cold, dead, fingers. He smiled and told me that he was the original editor of US Weekly. I was in the presence of celebrity gossip royalty. I couldn’t wait to tell my wife. We talked about journalism and the impact that blogs, social media, and wireless devices have had on the dessimination news and public perception. The good news is that thanks to Twitter, Youtube, and Facebook, we can receive information as it occurs. We followed the World Cup, the Arab Spring Revolution, and Lindsey Lohan’s latest stumble in real time. What can possibly be wrong with that? Accountability. He told me “Patrick, as a journalist, I am bound by rules. Sources must be vetted, information must be validated, opinions are not fact, and wikipedia is not a wellspring of truth. Bloggers, tweeters, and paparazzi are not bound by the same rules of journalism and ethics that I cut my teeth on.

Without accountability, we are doomed to developing a world view based on versions of the truth or outright falsehoods. There is a great line from the 1993 movie Jurassic Park where Jeff Goldblum’s character, Dr. Ian Malcolm is confronting billionaire John Hammond. He said “I’ll tell you the problem with the scientific power that you’re using here. It didn’t acquire any discipline to attain it. You read what others have done and you took the next step. You didn’t earn the knowledge for yourself so therefore you don’t take any responsibility for it.” 

Like good journalism, creating profitable and productive relationships demands accountability. Those relationships are predicated on two fundamental elements…liking and trust.  If your customers, teammates, or employees don’t feel that you are accountable for your actions and responsible for the outcomes you produce, then there can be no trust. Would you do business with someone you don't trust? I wouldn't. If you are a leader who doesn’t walk the talk, how can you expect your employees to cheerfully fulfill their responsibilities? If you are more concerned with closing a sale than providing value, how can you expect your customers to sing your praises? Build trust…build relationships…build profits.

Social Media Is For The Dogs!

I finally get social media.  No, I didn’t just acquire 500 linkedin connections, or get my twitter account up and running. Like 3/4ths of the human population, I have been a user of social media for years. It is only now that I finally get it. Like most facebook users over thirty, I segment my friends into those I went to high school with, college buddies, professional acquaintances, local friends, and cyber hookers with 46 friends who slip through the cracks undetected. I usually post witty remarks, photos, or videos about my life, business, kids, accomplishments, or challenges. I send it out into the universe hoping that my thousands of friends find me as interesting as I do. I am all things to all people.

      Yesterday I had a pure social media experience that gave me my AHA! Moment. My three year old was standing at the door yelling goggy, goggy. I was working in my office placating her with “that’s right dear, doggy, good doggy”. She became more animated so I got up and walked to the glass door. She was nose to nose with a black, wolfish looking dog that had wandered onto our porch. It turned out that the dog was very friendly, very thirsty, and very lost. Its tag had fallen off, so after giving it water and explaining to my daughter why we don’t put our face next to strange dogs, I took a picture with my Iphone and posted on my facebook page. My post simply said “lost dog. If you live in Burlington and recognize this dog, get in touch…before my kids get too attached”.  Within ½ hour, the dog was back home safe and sound with its grateful owners thanks to one of my facebook peeps who live next door to them. I now realize that this is what social media is all about. It is certainly what the 25 year old twitter users with 150,000 followers have understood from the start. Social media is about more than connection, it is about connecting on common ground.  It is about having a conversation with like minded souls on a specific topic. Did my 1500 plus facebook friends who do not live in my town respond to my post? No! because I wasn’t talking to them and they knew it. Most of us are like the guy on the off ramp with the sign that says “will work for food…God bless”. His message is generic and displayed without purpose. Thousands pass him daily with little interest in his message. When we start joining conversations based on topic, geography, ideology, brand loyalty etc., we can then make connections with individuals on a personal level. They will buy our products, align with our beliefs, and drink our kool-aid. By the way, if you happen to pay someone to tweet, post, or manage your social media, you have missed the point. In order to effectively use social media, you must be authentic and be willing to participate in a conversation. If you are the only one who is doing the talking, you are talking to yourself.

Is your phone menu screwing you?

I finally have it. The idea that will make me my first million. A pad that affixes to the side of my computer screen that I can punch repeatedly when I encounter an idiot by phone, web, or mail. It would not only be a great stress reliever, but a wonderful way to protect my computer screen.
      I would have punched it into tatters today after my dealings with a cd manufacturer that I was hoping to use to make my next batch of cds. Poor price point? nope, bad attitude by the sales rep? nope, inferior product? nope. What, you ask, could have set you off and down the road to senseless violence?... a crappy phone menu. We have all trudged through the maze of press 1 for accounting, press 2 for sales, press 3 for I am pissing my customers off by wasting their time with this attempt to avoid serving them with a live person, but this one takes the "Press 4 for cake". It took me over two minutes to finally reach the menu option that allowed me to enter the name of the person with whom I needed to speak, and only after I was given the number for maintenance. So what's the point? I teach that one of the 5 traction points in an effective customer relationship is empathy. Customers want their supplier to identify with their pains, problems, concerns or fears. This traction point can be avoided altogether if companies would stop causing the pain before the transaction even takes place.
         Like most married men with children, I look for opportunities to take a vacation with my wife AWAY from the kids. Do I need to explain? Ironically, it was a couple of those "little vacations" that were responsible for the kids in the first place. Those opportunities don't happen as often as we would like, so we take them when we can. Like most married men who are slipping away for a weekend with his wife, I like to set myself up for success. I make a reservation at a nice restaurant and hotel. I may even have a bottle of champagne chilling in the room when we arrive. Flowers always set the tone for a lovely evening. My chances for success would be significantly diminished, however,  if I called ahead to the hotel and had housekeeping mess up the bed, throw a wet towel on the bathroom floor and scatter the room with my dirty underwear. "Oh, while you're at it housekeeping, use the toilet and don't flush".
     When you set the tone for a customer interaction with a drawn out phone menu, uncomfortable waiting rooms, unclean facility, or laborious administrative processes, you are defying one of the most basic traction points for an extraordinary customer relationship, CONVENIENCE. Stop making it hard for me to give you my money. If you want to understand how your customers feel when doing business with you, call your own voicemail, or phone system.  Mystery shop your business and you will discover what it is like to do business with you. Walk a mile in your customers shoes.

Daddy Billy

Painting HiSTORY

Staring at the painting of the two Japanese women hanging in my mother’s house, I realize that I have stared at that picture my whole life. I first remember it on a wall in my grandparents’ house beside the upright piano that my grandfather loved to play, especially after a scotch on the rocks had loosened his fingers. Surrounded by southwestern art, a shadow box of arrow heads, and a painting of a running mule deer, I didn’t understand how out of place the painting of the two Japanese women was. I just knew that it was always there and had come to represent the dependable, unchanging, stability that tends to only be found at your grandparents’ house.

As a child, I always knew that my grandfather had fought in World War II, but his service had been somewhat marginalized in my young mind by what I saw in old movies and what little he told me about his experience. To me, WWII was a bunch of white guys wearing green or khaki uniforms with shirts tucked in and hair perfectly combed with a part down the side.  I also presumed that most of it was fought in black and white. Like my hundreds of plastic army men, no-one actually got hurt and everyone got to go home for dinner. It wasn’t until I had left my teenage years behind that I actually learned the truth about World War II and the truth about the painting.

If you study the painting in my mothers house, you may think it is good. You may even think it is really good despite the simplicity of the subjects. How much would you pay for a good painting? two hundred dollars, five hundred dollars, a thousand dollars? If you were to compare it to a similar painting, you may decide that it  doesn’t measure up. You may even begin to notice the rudimentary flaws in the design, the unproportioned features of the subjects, and perhaps the fallability of the artist. You may decide that it isn’t worth a lot of money until you hear, as Paul Harvey used to say,”the rest of the story”.

My Grandfather was an engineer in the Army Air Corps during World War II. He built runways and buildings on Okinawa. One of his responsibilities was to oversee Japanese POWs. We have all heard the horror stories of how the American POWs in the South Pacific were treated. I’ve learned that, as a whole, Americans were much kinder and humane to POWs than their Japanese counterparts and my grandfather was no different. Although efficient and strict, he treated the POWs he supervised with kindness and respect. He allowed no ill treatment on his watch. As a matter of fact, because of the humane treatment that the Japanese POWs received under my grandfather, they viewed him with respect. I was told that the Japanese soldiers would put on theatrical productions and invite him and his officers to attend. They would clear the front row to provide them a place to sit. When my grandfather was due to return to the States, he bid farewell to many of the Japanese POWs that he had come to know, and in some cases like. It was then that he was unexpectedly presented with a gift.

You may look at the painting of the two Japanese women hanging on the wall in my mothers house and think it is good. You may even decide you would pay two hundred dollars, five hundred or even a thousand dollars for such a painting. The value of the painting, however, may change in your mind if you knew that in 1945, a Japanese prisoner of war painted two Japanese women on a United States Army issued bed sheet using paints that he made with materials that he found in and around an Okinawan POW camp. He would then present the painting to my grandfather as a token of appreciation for the kindness bestowed upon he and his comrades by their captor. How about now? A million dollars, two million? How much would someone pay for a painting with the history of the one on my mother’s wall ? That is a question that will never be answered because the painting will never be sold.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Value is in the eye of the buyer. Long term relationships are created when value is provided. We routinely pay $4.00 for a cup of Starbucks Coffee, not because it tastes better than the coffee sold in the gas station or at McDonalds, but rather because of the context in which it is delivered. Why do people pay hundreds of dollars more for front row seats at a Broadway show or rock concert? CONTEXT! Creating an extraordinary customer experience is not simply about providing quality goods and services. It is about providing those goods and services within the context of:

1.     FRIENDSHIP- People will buy from friends first.

2.     TRUST- When your goal is to provide value rather than simply closing a sale then you establish trust.

3.     CONVENIENCE- Is it easy to do business with you? your customers will tell you.

4.     EMPATHY-  People want to buy from those who genuinely care about their  challenges and problems. When you care, you become a guide to the solution.

Whether you are in sales, management, education or an entrepreneur, the product, service, or message that we provide, is only as powerful as the person behind the product and the context in which it is delivered.

HOW TO WRITE AND DELIVER A FREAKING AMAZING SPEECH IN 30 MINUTES OR LESS

CHAPTER 8.

POSITIONING

Where you stand during your speech is a non-verbal communication between you and the audience that can make or break you as a speaker. We have all seen a speaker planted behind the lectern holding on for dear life.  Sometimes standing behind the lectern is appropriate, especially if there is a fixed microphone, but I like to move. I have seen powerful speeches given by speakers standing behind a lectern, but if you are going to do that then you must engage with other forms of nonverbal communication. Eye contact, acknowledgement of individuals or small groups, emotion, pauses, etc will enhance your presence and your connection with the audience.  If you have some flexibility as to where you stand, you must avoid certain mistakes such as pacing. Pacing is a natural nervous motion unconsciously employed by many amateur speakers. The best way to counter pacing is by planting and moving with purpose. When you begin your speech, do so from a power position, planted in front of the room. Don’t move unessesarily. The best time to move is when you finish a thought. Walk to another point in the room or on the stage and plant your feet. This is called moving with purpose. When you have no clear intent regarding your movement, the audience becomes distracted and uncomfortable.

TALKING TIP: PRACTICE MOVING WITH PURPOSE IN THE SAME WAY THAT YOU PRACTICE YOUR VERBAL DELIVERY.

DO THIS:

·         WRITE WHEN YOU ARE GOING TO MOVE INTO YOUR SCRIPT. EVEN IF YOU DON’T STICK TO IT, IT’S A BLUEPRINT THAT WILL HELP.